A L A S K A
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Introduction
On August 2, 2019 Gloria and I celebrated our Golden Wedding Anniversary. I dedicated two projects to Gloria on that auspicious date: New Mexico Photographs-1971-72 and Emergence, Atlanta, 1973. We decided to celebrate this special Anniversary by taking a tour of Alaska, which Gloria had longed to visit as a young child. We found a nine day tour that began on August 2 and booked it. However, the tour company had to cancel that tour and asked us to pick another date, so we chose the tour which began on August 16, 2019.
Day One of our nine day tour consisted of flying . . . from Rochester, NY to Minneapolis, and then on to Anchorage. Our early morning flight to Minneapolis did not arrive on time--it was delayed by a storm that had settled over the city. By the time we were able to land, our connecting flight to Anchorage had already departed. So we waited five hours in the Minneapolis Airport for our re-scheduled flight. I took a few walks during this time in hopes of finding something to photograph. (See Images 1, 2, 3, below).
Image #1 was made in a Men's Restroom. The window was two-thirds covered with a piece of frosted plastic. At first I was attracted to the light filtering through the plastic; then, as I more carefully considered making a photograph I noticed the luminous horizon line on the top of the plastic sheet and the multiple horizontal lines of light in the blue sky area above--which were reflections of ceiling lights in the bathroom. In retrospect I have noticed how Image #1 anticipated a beautiful, mysterious moment I experienced on Day 3 or our tour.
Minneapolis Airport
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#1
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Anchorage
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When we finally arrived in Anchorage--five hours later than planned--on Day 1 of our tour, Gloria and I were surprised to discover that three young people working for our tour company were waiting to greet us at the airport gates. They took our bags for us and put them on a tour bus and we were transported, along with a few other late arrivals, to our hotel.
#4
Day 2: After breakfast the next day I took a walk behind the Hotel where I thought I could see reflections of light coming off water. I was surprised to discover a beautiful river with ducks swimming in it, with stretches of tress and the surrounding mountains beyond. (see Image #4 above).
After a bus tour of Anchorage we were dropped in the middle of town. The afternoon was "free time" to do whatever we wanted. We knew that in the evening there would be a tour-provided dinner of fresh fish. Since Gloria is vegan and I am vegetarian, we decided to find some place in town that offered tofu dishes. We also wanted to visit the Anchorage Museum, so as we walked toward the museum we looked for places and asked people about where we could find some tofu dishes.
#5
Gloria's middle name should be Tofu. She must have it--that's all there is to it. We eventually passed by an unlikely store front that was advertising hamburgers and subs. The name of the place was Scottie's Sub Shop, however by chance I noticed a little sign in the window that was advertising Tofu Soup. I looked a little further and found in the window a menu that offered various Oriental and Korean dishes as well as subs and burgers. click here to see the menu We went inside to explore.
It was past 1:00pm and it was quiet inside. The owner of the place walked out to greet us. We talked a little and learned that he and his wife had come to Alaska many years ago from South Korea and purchased Scottie's from the previous owner. We told him we were interested in the Tofu Soup--but with "no meat," "no fish" and "no chicken." There were some language difficulties but he finally understood and offered to make Gloria a vegan Tofu Soup dish, and for me a stir fry with tofu and vegetables. I tried to explain that I wanted a very simple dish. He said "just soy sauce?" and I shook my head with a smile, and he smiled and went to the back to cook for us.
While we waited for the food I took a picture from the inside of the store front window with all the signs in it (Image #5 above). ~ After a while the man came out with the food and to our great delight the food was quite wonderful. Both dishes were rich in taste, with plenty of fresh vegetables, and no cornstarch! I mean, the food was really quite special. Gloria's dish came with homemade Kimchi, which she said was the best she ever tasted, and we were given freshly made hot tea --no charge. We expressed our heartfelt gratitude to him several times and he was very pleased with our response.
By the time we were ready to leave the man had gone out to make a delivery, so we rang a bell on the counter and his wife came out from the back kitchen area to greet us. We were looking at a religious sign on the wall near the cash register when she came out. The words were in Korean (with an English translation in smaller type below). When Gloria became visibly touched by the words, the Korean woman and Gloria started talking for a while as best they could. Then the Korean woman looked at Gloria and, with a big smile, reached her arms out to Gloria and said MaMa and gave Gloria a very loving hug. (This, by the way, is not an unusual kind of interaction for Gloria, but the loving connection between the two women was unusually heartfelt and wonderful for me to witness.)
We then walked on to our planned destination--a visit to the Anchorage Museum. The building is stunningly beautiful inside and out, and their changing exhibition spaces (huge spaces) were devoted to contemporary works of art about Alaska by Alaskan artists.
However, the very best part of the museum was the permanent exhibition on the second floor: Living Our Cultures; Sharing Our Heritage: The First People of Alaska created by the Smithsonian Institution with great sensitivity, excellent exhibition design, and a deep respect for and understanding of the indigenous peoples of Alaska. It is quite a powerful experience, especially with a very professionally done audio-visual exhibition of natives telling their personal stories--and their ancestors' stories--of life in Alaska. Some of the stories were at times heart wrenching at times, and at other times very beautiful, with current and historical video footage and still photographs intermixed with the living video portraits of the the people telling their heartfelt stories. This exhibition is not to be missed if you ever visit Anchorage.
#6
Early the next morning, which was Day 3 of our nine day tour, we were bussed to the Anchorage Airport for our flight to Fairbanks. As the sun was coming up over the mountains and flooding the airport with light, I took the photograph above, Image #6. I was struck by the atmospheric quality of the image and the shadowy phantom-like figures in the foreground, and the sweep of mountains in the background. Later I noticed that this view of the mountains is very similar to the view I took behind our hotel (Image 4). In fact the three images above (#2, #3 and #4) all share a similar formal order based on shapes moving across the horizontal picture space. I feel the living presence of the ancient indigenous peoples of Alaska in the phantom shapes in Image #6.
D E N A L I
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#7
The photograph above (#7) represents what I saw from my middle row seat, on the left side of our jet airplane as we were flying to Fairbanks from Anchorage. Gloria had fallen asleep; and as I happened to glance out toward the window to the left of me--one seat away--all of a sudden, unexpectedly, I saw Denali floating by the plane's narrow rounded vertical window! This beautiful mountain peak, the highest in North America, appeared to me as a precious, luminous, blue jewel suspended between blue and blue. Then, all too quickly, the stunning vision passed beyond the window's frame, out of sight, as we flew on toward Fairbanks.
I felt frustrated that I had not been able to make a photograph of Denali--though I knew that I would have had to be sitting next to the window to get a good picture. It did occur to me to ask the young man sitting next to the window to take a picture for me . . . but my camera was packed away on the floor by my feet, and he was preoccupied with taking his own photographs with his mobil phone.
The young man's name was Robert. He was the last person to board the plane in Anchorage that morning. As he was approaching our row of seats to take his place by the window, Gloria and I were preparing to place some sweaters and coats in an overhead storage area. Robert offered to stow them away for us, then he quickly snuck passed by us and took his seat by the window and immediately began working on his computer.
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After we landed in Fairbanks and as the plane was taxiing to the docking area I took the opportunity to talk to the young man. I mentioned I was a photographer and that I had thought of asking him to take a picture of Denali for me. After I expressed my disappointment at having missed the opportunity to photograph the beautiful mountain he immediately offered to text me all the photos he had taken of Denali. He asked for my mobil number, and I asked his name.
A few minutes later I received several of his photographs on my phone, one of which I used to construct the image above (with the aide of Photoshop software). The image is a surprisingly close approximation of what I saw in that moment when Denali appeared to float by the plane's window.
My brief encounter with Denali, and with Robert was for me the most beautiful and meaningful moment of our trip to Alaska. Over time, my experience deepened in meaning as I continued contemplating Roberts gift of the photographs in relation to my experience of Denali that morning in the airplane. Indeed, a second image--more important to me than the first (Image #7)--emerged from inside the first one. above. I will present that image and write about it in the Epilogue to this project, below.
Fairbanks
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August 18, 2019 When we arrived in Fairbanks that morning (Day 3 of our tour), we were given a bus tour of Fairbanks then sometime after noon we were dropped off across the street from our Hotel, next to a park full of vendors--it was the town's weekly Sunday Market Day. We were on our own until 6:00 pm when --once again-- we would be bussed to a traditional Alaskan Salmon Bake. Gloria and I were hungry and decided to see if we could find some tofu. Fairbanks has a relatively large Asian population, and I remembered seeing a Thai restaurant on a street behind the Hotel and a few block further south.
However, when we got off the bus Gloria tripped on the curb and fell to the street just in front of the bus. I heard her yell "Steve!" and when I looked back I saw her falling. She hit the hard pavement with frightening force. She tried to protect herself from the fall by placing her left arm out in front of her. I thought I saw the side of her head hit the pavement. It was a terrifying sight!
Gloria remained conscious after the fall, and told those of us trying to help her that she would need to have her arm x-rayed; it was really hurting her. (Her head had no visible abrasions.) Someone called for an ambulance and within minutes an Emergency Unit from the Fairbanks Fire Department arrived. The two men carefully placed Gloria in a portable bed and then into the ambulance; one man stayed with her and began checking her vital signs and asking questions so he give a report to the people waiting for us at the Fairbanks Hospital Emergency Department. I rode in the front with the driver.
We were in the Emergency Room for about five hours. Gloria was given pain medications, then they X-rayed her left shoulder and humerus. The x-rays report stated there were four fractures of the left humerus. The attending Doctor had an assistant prepare a fiberglass immobilizer to hold her arm close to her body. Because Gloria was heavily drugged they kept her in the Emergency room a while so her body could have a chance to metabolize some of the drugs before releasing her. I arranged with the Hotel to pick us up in their large van.
We got checked into our Hotel room sometime after 7:00 pm. Gloria just slept. The drugs she had been given helped her have a long needed rest after the horrible trauma her body had been put through. I called our tour company's emergency telephone number and explained what had happened and we arranged to talk again the next morning after I had a chance to see how Gloria was feeling. The question was open regarding Gloria's ability to continue the tour.
The next morning (Monday, Day 4 of the tour) it became quite clear that Gloria was in too much pain to consider going on with the tour. A bus trip to Denali National Park was the next item on the tour's itinerary, and our tour guide told us the road was rough going and that there was no medical facility in the park. When I talked with our tour company emergency team they told us they would begin working on setting up our return flights to Rochester, NY.
A few hours later I got a call from our tour company: reservations had been arranged for our flight back home. We would leave Fairbanks that night at 1:00 AM (Tuesday morning). We arrived into Rochester, NY about 14 hours later. Delta Airlines was very accommodating. They arranged special seating for all three of our flights in advance, as close as possible to the first class seating where there was more leg room and wider seats. When we arrived in Anchorage, and Detroit there were wheel chairs waiting for Gloria. There was a delay in Detroit so we got into Rochester, NY. a few hours later than planned. It was a long and painful trip back home for Gloria.
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The five pictures below (Images 8-12) were made in our Fairbanks hotel room Monday night, between 6pm and 11pm, before we left for the Airport to begin our 14 hour journey home. The images reflect the sad and dark and worried mood we both were experiencing at that time.
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We had set up an appointment with an orthopedic surgeon the day after we got back home. After studying the x-rays and consulting with other doctors in his group our surgeon decided it would be best to wait to see if Gloria's humerus, with the four fractures, could heal on its own.
It could be several weeks yet before we will know for sure if a shoulder replacement will be necessary. Gloria was told to be very carful not to damage her arm as it tries to heal itself, and yet she is to try use her left hand and writs as much as possible without pulling, lifting or pushing things with here left arm. (I may provide an update on Gloria's situation here in the future if it seems appropriate.)
Epilogue
The Sacred Mountain
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Denali
My experience of Denali--seeing it from within the airplane on its way to Fairbanks--has been haunting me. And my further contemplations of that experience have compelled me to write more.
When I saw Denali in the blue distance through the plane's narrow window, Robert was making photographs with his phone camera. I felt frustrated that I had not been able to photograph Denali myself . . . However, I realize now that on a deeper level of awareness--where seeing happens with the "eyes of the Heart"--I had been responding internally, intuitively to Denali's sacred nature as I watched to float by in the window.
Indeed, many Native Alaskans have considered Denali to be a Sacred Mountain, and I certainly felt that presence as I was blessed with a brief encounter of its majesty. Denali had appeared to me as a blue self-luminous jewel suspended in infinite space, and I felt very connected to its spiritual presence. The mountain's beauty--its elegant crystalline form, and its ineffable internal radiance--represented for me . . . as best as I can put into words, the totality of all Creation, the Oneness of Being.
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Robert had given me his five photographs with sincere heartfelt compassion and enthusiasm, and I received them as the precious and sacred gifts that they were. Later, when I had a chance to look at the images more carefully, I could see that some of the images were like raw diamonds which contained within them the promise of a photographic image of True Sacred Beauty, but I would have to work with those images to unveil the gem hidden within the raw material.
My process of editing and transforming the images Robert had given me became a way for me to deepen my contemplations of my experience in the plane, and understand better what and how I had seen Denali in those surprising and fleeting moments as we were flying to Fairbanks. I came to realize that not only was Robert's gift of photographs an offering of grace to me, but indeed my brief but nonetheless visionary encounter with Denali was a blessing that would serve to help keep me focused on the Sacredness of all life in the midst of what would immediately follow after landing in Fairbanks--that is to say, Gloria's fall.
Fig. 1
Fig. 2
The two images above (Fig. 1 and Fig. 2) are variations on one of the five photographs Robert had given me. Fig. 1 represents my initial perception of Denali--how I had seen it passing by the window of the plane from my constricted middle row seat in an overpacked airplane.
Fig. 2 represents my much more deeply considered, intuitive and greatly expanded "visionary" perception of Denali.
Fig. 2 is a very powerful image for me, one that functions for me as a symbol. It is radiant with sacred creative energy; it is overflowing with a Self-luminous other-worldly kind of light--the light of grace which gives the image of the Mountain a palpable presence as it sits eternally still and silent in its own infinitely vast blueness.
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In 1987 Gloria and I began practicing Siddha Yoga Mediation and have continued performing the yogic practices continually to this very day. One of the major yogic texts that we return to over and over again is the spiritual autobiography of Swami Muktananda entitled The Play of Consciousness. Near the end of this astounding book--which details Muktananda's spiritual journey to full conscious realization of Union with the divine Self--he writes about his many visions of the Blue Pearl, the Blue One, the Blue Person, and the Eternal Blue of Consciousness. When I began contemplating my experience of Denali--suspended like a "blue jewel" in "blue space"--I of course flashed on Muktananda's teachings about the Blue Pearl which is the Origin of all that is, and all that is not, and the sacred presence which pervades all created forms. (See my photography project entitled The Blue Pearl.)
I will conclude this Epilogue, then, with an excerpt from The Play of Consciousness which I feel relates directly to my interior encounter with the sacred mountain Denali, and my experience of the photograph which gives visual equivalent form to my heart-opening visionary experience. Indeed, I consider the photograph a visual revelation of the great, sacred space of the divine Self--the "Heart of Grace." When I contemplate the image I feel I am inside my own Heart, the sacred space of the Oneness of Being.
Here now is an excerpt from Swami Muktananda's Play of Consciousness:
Through the gift of [my guru] Bhagavan Sri Nityananda's grace, I was gaining the realization that the Blue One was my own Self, the One who lives within all, pervades the entire universe and sets it in motion, who is one-without-a-second, nondual and undifferentiated, and yet is aways at play, becoming many from one and one from many. He is the eternal Blue of Consciousness, the Self of yogis. . . This eternal Blue of Consciousness is Muktananda Swami's own beloved deity, Sri Guru Nityananda. This eternal Blue of Consciousness is the Siddha students' divine power of grace.
I began to see that He, through whose grace maya becomes known as the manifestation of the Lord, is my Self appearing as the Blue Pearl. I began to see that the Blue One, whose light spreads through the whole world, the One from whom I received knowledge, who is the pure transcendent Witness of all, the unchanging Being, the unchanging Truth, is my inner Self.
He who reveals Himself for a moment and hides Himself for a moment, yet is revealed even when hidden, is my Self. Swami Muktananda, from The Play of Consciousness, chapter 22, The Eternal Blue of Consciousness.
This project was announced on my blog's
Welcome Page on October 18, 2019.
Related Projects:
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